I did it! Now what do I do.

Guess what? I quit my job yesterday (or at least gave 2 weeks notice). I gave notice on my apartment last month after I wrote my last post and I have to move out by the end of this week. And after a month of searching, I still haven't found the right thing or where to move. It's driving me completely crazy. I mean, completely.

I am moving everything into storage and taking my cat, cat tree and the essentials (the bags get larger and larger everyday) and I am moving into my friend Rebecca's basement. Initially this was fall back should I be unable to find the right place. I can't believe she offered. I am soooo incredibly thankful that this is even an option!

So my living situation isn't settled (but I am not homeless, thank God!) and I accepted a job (official as of yesterday) working as an ophthalmology technician at George Washington University's Medical Faculty Associates. It's the clinics were the med school student go learn and the med school teachers actually see (pun-pun) real patients. Picture your doctor's office but squished into half size rooms and then triple the number of patients in the waiting room. They are expanding the ophthalmology clinics. There are 7 (I think) different clinics within the ophthalmology department for different types of problems.

Can you tell how scattered I feel about my own life? Oddly enough (or not when you consider the psychology of the matter) it is translating into much better focus at work. I am really chopping away and getting stuff pushed out and finished so much faster than usual!

I can't wait! I am going to be broke but I am soooo excited about the work! its going to be completely awesome!

its going to be a long couple of days

Merissa is moving, work is in turmoil, I have meetings in weird locations (Rockville without a car sounds like a good time, doesn't it?). Frankly, I am just tired and hoping that wonderful solution I can settle comfortably into appears on the horizon. But frankly, I have prayed and worked for these changes. How can I possibly complain when the change finally happens. So what if I need a cheaper place to live! Seriously, jobs pretty much thrown in my lap and I am complaining because the one I want doesn't pay enough but has lots of potential? Shut up, Malia, and get on with finding a roommate. There is SOOO much more of life to live.

Follow up to New Year's resolutions disclosures= med school interview

Ok, so I actually got an interview for med school. Virginia Tech Carilion. Its a new school (only 1 class so far) but it is provisionally accredited. I interviewed this weekend and I really, really like the faculty and the students. One of the charter class is even from UW and lived across the street from me in the 17th ave guys house (Christian guys house across the street) and graduated a year after me. How exceptionally funny is that! I know this still a long shot. But I keep hoping it is less of a long shot than I think. For all of you supporters, you have serious confidence in my awesomeness which isn't completely borne out it my application.

When I received the first rejection from GW (they interviewed 1,000 people, can you imagine?that is just insane!) I started to think that it was time to pull it together. So I started an MS project schedule of reapplying for this coming year. I think I need to pull it out and get it started. So that if I get in, good; if I don't, life won't end. After actually visiting Roanoke and the school, its really hard not to be very attached the idea of actually starting in August. I feel like the school is a really good fit for me (if not perfect). Lots of places to come up with new ideas and really cool learning style and even solid opportunities at the affiliated hospital (its a level 1 trauma center with 15 residencies). I know that I would not be the first one who has reapply for a couple of years. I just wish I could be one of the ones' who don't have to.

I am seriously thinking of making some changes though if I am not accepted on the first cut. It might be time to be drastic in my life realignment. Time to get started doing something I love.

New Year's Resolutions and Life Round Up

So . . . I have not been super forthcoming to my blog readers. You've had to catch me in person to find the big news in my life: I have submitted some last minute (really last minute) applications to med schools. All East Coast schools (sorry, they had later deadlines!). I haven't wanted to talk about because I had the feeling like talking about it would jinx it. Plus I have a serious inferiority complex about med school and being an MD. I feel driven to be in the field but seriously less than everyone else who could (and does) apply each year. I haven't: worked in lab; inoculated children anywhere; received 3.7 GPA in the sciences. What I am hoping is that I would prove different enough, or at least interesting enough, to let into school.

My phrase for this season? Hail Mary (as in pass, from football?). I have said it so many times I am completely irritated with myself. I need to integrate some new sports terminology.

But I have gone further this year, inspite of the lateness. I have actually submitted secondary applications to two schools and am on track for two more, which I did not do the previous season. My chances are really small (I can't emphasize that enough). But for all the hedging I am doing I am still hopeful. Really hopeful. Completely NOT commensurate with my actual chances hopeful.

So my resolutions for this year, not surprisingly, have to do with med school and my job.

1) By January 1 next year I will be working in the medical field. Period. Either full or part time or in school working toward the same. End of story. I will be doing something that matters toward who I want to be and where I want to be. Everyone (myself included) will be happier when that happens.

2) By January 1 next year I will be either in medical school (totally off chance, but here's hoping) or completely done with secondary applications.
a) If I have to apply again next year, I will need to retake the MCAT (most schools won't take my score from tests more than 2 years old)

Needless to say, I need to get on the ball.

New project #4

Yep, I started a new project at work. Again. Man I need to grow up and go back to school and do something I truly love and believe in. If only I felt sure all the time that I knew what that actually was.

I started working for a really awesome PM, who had been a colleague on a previous project. Unfortunately the project may end soon, we aren't sure. We are up for recompete on this project too. I live in a wasteland of short term contracts. Thank goodness I finally took a leap on an apartment. If I kept waiting for something long term, I might never be going anywhere.

On this project, I finally get to be an analyst instead of an admin. Officially. On the last job, I totally made up my own title. I don't take appointments for someone elses calendar, I don't handle a general phone line, and I don't have to deal exclusively with one messy government client. Just a group of four clients, all battling for supremacy. Which may end up being worse after all.

Let you know how it goes. I may have to go into witness protection, but one day, I will find a venue for the ridiculousness I have been privy to working for the government.

This is the photo everyone in the office saw

In fact, it went out in email. Yep, that's the back of me. Playing putt-putt golf. And getting a hole in one!

2088+ socks: so ridiculous I couldn't make this stuff up

I have decided to write a completely anonymous blog with just the random (excuse the word) crap that actually happens everyday working for the government. Par example: Today, 1044 pairs of socks (2088 individual socks or possibly 1044 pairs of socks per carton with 5 cartons delivered total; we aren't sure) were delivered to my office this afternoon. They were intended for a detention center in El Paso. I guess I am glad it's mid-May and likely fairly warm in Texas this time of year. And I am going to hope that this wasn't a last minute extreme need purchase. Because the vendor made a mistake. And knowing the government and government vendors, its going to be a while before these socks make it to their intended owners. And these boxes will be cluttering my cube walkway for a while.

That moment when you realize you grew up

Somewhere along the way, apparently I grew up just a little. Funny that it has taken until 27 and I am still not where I planned to be. However, by and large, I am happier and more emotionally healthy than I have ever been. I had to give presentations at work and they went really well. I got a lot of good feedback and I will be doing more of the same type over the next couple of weeks. Just remembering my fears of unknown situations, unknown people, and public speaking I am amazed. I still instinctively shy away from unknown situations, parties where I won't know more than one person or where I will be too much on display. Let's face it, very few people are truly comfortable or blossom in those situations (more power to you extroverts!). But I have survived several uncomfortable encounters lately with no scars or major traumas.

People who haven't know me long actually laugh at me when I say I am shy. Mostly because my shorter term acquaintances are work-related. In the workplace I have a purpose and am confident; I am a value-add (don't you love the irritating business language use?). I am under-employed at work and I am fully aware of that fact.

I am back to being uncertain about my long term work outlook. The government has decided to in-source to positions currently being filled by my contracting company. I am not sure yet what I will do, whether I will try for a government position and a pay cut, or hold out for another contracting position which may only last for a few months. A Democratic Administration is not the time to be relying on a plethora of contracting jobs popping up. I am hopeful that something will come along suited to my personality, long-term goals, and talents. Or rather, I remain hopeful. I have been waiting for a while. :)

Tech writer's rant

1. Spellcheck. It's not an option.
2. No, you cannot use the return key (creating new paragraphs) to create double-spaced documents. There are several much easier ways to do this in Word or any other reputable word processing software (Google Docs, Lotus Notes, anything). This not only make the document necessarily longer, using more paper when printed and irritating any discerning reader, it also creates headaches when converting to Adobe pdf and trying to make it 508-compliant, accessible to screen-readers everywhere.
3. Not everything is "Body Text." Styles were created for a reason. Use them.
4. If you are going to deviate from the set MS standard styles, please use your own new style consistently. If you start one section on a new page, start the next section on a new page too. If you number using a "A-1" style in the footer, don't use a "A.1" in the document.
5. When creating numbered lists, do not include use punctuation at the end item UNLESS every item in the list is a complete, COMPLETE sentence. For those unfamiliar with complete sentences, let me refresh your memory: a complete sentence includes a noun, a subject and a verb.
6. Please, please use underlining and bold and italics judiciously. These are for infrequent use. If more than 1/8 (13%) of your document (excluding headings) is underlined, italicized or in bold it's time to rewrite. All 66 pages cannot be the most important thing in the document. I agree, there are excellent reasons for using emphasis. But a reader starts feeling irritated when everything in the document is emphasized.
7. Please do not use tabs or spaces to center text on the page.
8. If you have to hand create a table of contents in MS Word 2003 or later, then you are not creating documents correctly. There is an automated function to make the whole thing easier for everyone, especially me.
9. Just because something looks nifty doesn't make it easy to read.
10. Just because something needs to hold water legally doesn't mean it needs to be incomprehensible to anyone except a lawyer.
11. If it doesn't sound like it makes sense, it probably doesn't make sense.

Wasting the day away

So today is one of those days: little to do and lots of time to do it in. I actually have no projects or tasks to complete right now. I just finished a masterpiece of employee motivational imagery (cool poster) and some spreadsheet details. The posters I will have to work on additionally but until I get the photos from the Public Affairs office (I've been waiting since Thursday; how hard is this people) I can't really do much. Tomorrow I will be photo treking through the different divisions of employees with my program office so people can feel connected and see themselves and really helping with the mission and vision of DHS/our component. But right now I have 2.5 hours to kill doing something. Hopefully for taxpayers and myself I will do something marginally productive. But its not looking super likely. Hopefully tomorrow will be better and a little more interesting.

I think I am going to raid the supply closet for now. . .

Its hard to stay when no one else will. . .

Specifically the office. My new clients do tend to stay 'til later hours and then actually leave their work at home (no midnight emails yet). But right this moment its 5:02 pm on Friday night. I want to bolt but I really need to stay an few more minutes. My work so far has been rather limited in scope and interest but I am hopefully that my tasks become more complex and the people will stay friendly and without personality disorders.

I worked out this morning. I am so proud since this has almost become a habit. Unfortunately for every workout and healthy meal, I eat almost commensurate amounts of the junk. Ironically it was easier to eat better before I started trying to eat better. Today my project manager brought in cookies: oatmeal-raison, chocolate chip and sugar cookies. Not super fantastic (actually the oatmeal was rather excellent) but I still ate quiet a few. Ugh. If I truly had stopped to ask the question, "is this really where I want to spend my calorie budget today?" the answer would be "No."

Evolve

Our government agency program office has been trying to "Evolve" for some time: increase process and procedure, creation and adherence; improve customer service satisfaction; etc. There is a little metro map that goes along with this. Someone has rebelled.

Nothing says "process and performance improvement" like a nuclear blast.

Last day. . .here at least

Today is the last day of our contract here. The Ides of March, how odd. What a bizarre day to choose to end a contract. I had never planned to be in DC this long. I had really hoped to be back in Seattle by now. But life (and the Lord) has a way of making Robert Burns true: "best laid plans o' mice and men gang aft aglay." Truly, it has not been a bad thing. In fact, I have learned a great deal.

But tomorrow it's a new position, with new responsibilities. Ostensibly, the same as the one I currently occupy. So hopefully I will still be able to learn and grow.

How did I make it to Friday?

Life seems to be whirling by. Days get longer, months get shorter. How does that happen? Just another time paradox. I can't tell you how lovely it is to have warmer weather here in DC. A balmy 55 and Samantha pulls out her flip-flops for getting to work.

Even the rain today is wonderful. It makes me feel at home away from Seattle, plus it is significantly whittling away at those large piles of snow still left from the February storm. One of the piles has been blocking the path to the bus stop for more than a month and forces every one to climb over it or step straight into the muck.

Last weekend, my friend Aaron and I went biking ride around the Mall. We talked about going again tomorrow morning but I think the rain and "urban flooding" (otherwise known as large puddles) may keep my exercise indoors. I convinced Merissa to try this yoga place in DuPont that I still haven't even been to yet! I have never done yoga actually so trying it out tomorrow should be funny for all the on lookers, at the very least.

I am starting in a new position with my same company, in the same building. Different folks but still working for ICE (Immigration and Customs Enforcement). It will be a whole new challenge. I am getting very excited to start full-time on Tuesday (my current position closes on Monday, March 15, the Ides).

And I am really excited for my birthday this year. March 22 I will be 27 years old. That isn't too bad. I have made it this far without completely messing up. I like being older and growing in confidence and hopefully wisdom. Thank the Lord we don't have to stay 12 for our whole lives

Apparently getting married?

A good friend at work, one of my government clients, announced to a branch meeting that my moving jobs was good timing since it was just in time for us to get married. I may have laughed a little hard . . . and long. Sorry Bob. It was just so unexpected. But thanks for the compliment.

I didn't plan to be here, but that's ok

I didn't plan to still be in DC. I planned to be happily returned home to Seattle by now. Except now its more than just me in the US location with licenses plates "Taxation Without Representation." I joined Hope and Terry and Payton and Hailey. My friend from UW, Samantha, moved down from New York. Now Merissa has moved out and so has her best friend Mashari. Suddenly I am surrounded with family and friends. And I have wonderful friends from work: Rebecca and Kristen. God has truly taken away my loneliness for friends that I felt so deeply last winter.

And so I find myself actually living in DC. And apparently staying for while. School ... there are lots of questions there. In a week from Tuesday I will be starting with a new contract, a new client, doing something hopefully a little more interesting and challenging. Still a contractor for the federal government supporting Immigration Customs Enforcement. How completely odd to say that! It has been a learning experience. I hope (I believe) my patience and understanding has increased.

I don't know where I will be in 10 years (I hope I will be doing something I love). It is nice to feel that I may actually be where I am supposed to be for while. For me this is a huge step forward.

Hiding under your desk

Is it bad that I have the reoccuring urge to hide under my desk at work. I am not cut out for this job, despite the fact that most days I am apparently fairly good at it. The entire department works on fire to fire basis. We only work on the most urgent thing, never forward planning. For something to gather enough attention to merit work, it has to be blazing out of control and going badly.

Alright, I admit: I am in a bad mood today but I am not sure how to change the tides to better. Any suggestions?

Work battle pay

I believe that work should request an "emotional toll taken" as well as "hours worked." A percentage increase would be added for especially ridiculous days, where you stay at work even though any sane person would quit on the spot. Maybe that is the problem: to work you have to take a certain level of abuse that we should be free to walk away from. Maybe loving your job mitigates the treatment. Maybe there is hope for work. I don't have much of it today.

The Big Easy

I have eaten and eaten here in New Orleans. I think I will be able to live off the amount of food I have eaten in the last few days for at least several weeks. Especially the pralines I bought this morning that may completely block my arteries with butter. But dang are they good!

I am here for work attending a team conference for my branch. It has been frustrating and hard. However I think it has also been good for communication. Those that were even remotely inclined to listen were able to listen more. There were those that are incapable of hearing who remain remote. I am hoping that people can start to feel more confident in the capability of those they work with enough to start doing a better job.

I promise to post pictures and video. And tell actual stories.

Balancing being gone

I realized after my first paycheck that I really am not going to have enough leave accrued to be away for the holidays. Which is seriously annoying given that I want to be home for both Thanksgiving and Christmas. Luckily I am already set up to work for home and I got the ok from my boss and my client to work from home around Thanksgiving! So I will be in Seattle on Wednesday and Friday but still "at work". Which is great. By the time Christmas rolls around I will have enough time accrued to actually be in Seattle and not at work for the week.

Paster Earl Palmer, who was executive pastor at our church University Presbyterian in Seattle, has now become the preaching pastor in residence at National Presbyterian which is less than 2 miles from my house. It will be nice to have something familiar in worship. I have been feeling displaced on that level.

Amusingly, as some of you are aware, the assistant secretary of ICE (the head of the org.) who is appointed by the president and confirmed by the congress (or in this case, recess appointed) announced the day after the election that she was resigning from her post as of the 15th. Its amusing on many levels, but also because this will be the first time I get to view a "changing" party winds blow through my job life. Luckily my job is safe and my humor is intact because it looks to be an interesting period. Look for amusing updates that I can actually relate without breaking my non-disclosure agreement. The stories I can already tell are bad but unfortunately. . . probably not supposed to be shared either!